I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
