Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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