she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
