She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
