You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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