So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Randomize
