we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I deserve this hangover.
Randomize
