i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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