member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize