we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I forgot how hot balto sounded
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
