Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
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