I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
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