D3 body, D1 cock
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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