dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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