That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
