Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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