I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
