i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize