The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
