Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Randomize
