we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Randomize
