i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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