Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
