its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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