is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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