When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
