I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
