Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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