i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
