after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize