every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize