i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
