What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
nutella sex= disaster
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
