Well apparently he's into motor boating.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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