In the future we'll all be gay
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
She even gives head with a lisp.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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