no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
