:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
false alarm, still single
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
