playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
