Screwed.edu
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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