this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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