so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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