The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
