i just made my gag reflex go away.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize