whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize