We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize