Sorry, I don't speak sober.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize