a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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