the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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