I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
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