Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
