Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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